Happy 13th Anniversary

Heather and I have been married thirteen years. I don't know about you but for some reason that number jumps out at me. I know. We are all about numbers divisible by five and ten in the way we see milestones. However this year is the one where the dawning realization of "Wow, we have been married for a long time!" catches up to you. In other words, our marriage is now a teenager except fortunately it is not acting like one.

Over Memorial Day weekend I undertook the project of rebuilding most of our deck. I had never done something like this before and there are about a hundred different things that could go wrong in the course of a task of this nature. Not to mention, this sort of work, the cutting of wood and what not is not in my wheelhouse. I am a computer guy. Build a website? Sure. Build a deck? That might not end so well.

I am not sure how it would have turned out had Heather not been there to help me. She was the detailed eye where I would have been prone to throw up my hands and say, "yeah that's good." She was out there flattening out nails in the old wood and cutting the longer boards in half with a power saw so it would fit in the van for a trip to the dump. At some level I am sure I could have done the whole thing alone but then again I would probably still be out there doing it.

The deck is a microcosm of one thing we've learned to do really well and that is operating in that complimentary fashion. Not to mention, having Heather just out there keeping me company or making suggestions made the process go quicker. It is as that point you realize that it wasn't the tangible assistance my wife rendered that made the most difference (though that was huge) but the intangible ones.

So what am I saying? That my wife is basically good as free labor on a weekend project? By no means. At the end of the day, as much as I appreciated the fact she share the load in the job, I was more excited by the fact she was just there to be my friend. We undertook a project together it was a smashing success. The deck is not perfect. There are little things off here and there. Sort of like our marriage or like most people's marriages. However the good has far outweighed the bad.

In 13 years we have loved each other through shower of life's circumstances. We are husband and wife, mommy and daddy, teachers and coaches. We've been plumbers and now sub-contractors. On our 13th anniversary I look out at that deck thinking we did a great job taking on something we had zero experience with and getting it done to a point we can be proud of it.

I would like to think after 13 years we can say the same thing about our marriage.